


oh, i hope some day, i'll make it out of here.

by queenclarityblu



Series: highschool sweethearts [1]
Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Main Video Game Series), Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types, Pocket Monsters: Sword & Shield | Pokemon Sword & Shield Versions
Genre: Depression, F/M, I dont know how to write, PLEASE END ME, Suicide, but i also dont wanna lose the idea, but ive done like everything in the game lol, depression moment lmao, hes babey, i feel so bad for beating him, i forgot my title while typing these, i had this idea at 4am, i hated him at first but by the end of the game i just wanted to hug him, i just wanna give hop a hug, im legit writing this outside with my sister, im not DONE with it please im not ready, im not over it yet, im procrastinating writing this, im so gay for hop, im so sad i finished the game, ive never written hop before, this is gonna be really bad, vent - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-07
Updated: 2020-05-07
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:20:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24051232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenclarityblu/pseuds/queenclarityblu
Summary: even if it takes all night, or a hundred years.- - - - - - - -bonnie had only won the championship a few months ago, and hop is learning fast as professor sonia's assistant. bonnie keeps finding herself back at the heart of slumbering weald.
Relationships: Hop (Pokemon)/Original Character(s)
Series: highschool sweethearts [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1735723
Comments: 5
Kudos: 6





	oh, i hope some day, i'll make it out of here.

**Author's Note:**

> god this took me so long to write. i'm not sure if i'm too proud of it or anything, but i'm afraid to show it to my friends so i'm just gonna post this here.

Bonnie had been champion for a couple months now.

  
It was about twice a week she replayed those three days in her head. She beat Marnie, beat Hop, literally saved the Galar region, and then defeated Leon. Then almost a week later, she had defeated those sword and shield pricks, and her and Hop had been granted the honor to call the sword and shield Pokemon part of their team. Some things had blurred together, but others almost haunted her.

It was small things. Like when she had defeated Hop, and the noise of an adoring audience screaming and his dynamxed Pokemon's relinquished cry as it fell to the stadium floor, shaking the ground Hop and her stood on like an earthquake. Amidst the rubble, beyond the sight of her own Sylveon returning to normal and rushing to her, rubbing against her leg in joy, she saw Hop's expression very clearly. He was hurt, and his pride was damaged, but he was so proud of her. How selfless and kind... to be proud of his friend, his rival and maybe more, to be proud they crushed your dream? That with a cry of a Pokemon that could level a city, all she saw was pride. When everything had cleared she heard the announcer yell: challenger Bonnie is headed to the finals! And the scream of fans rose again as she rushed to Hop to meet in the middle of the arena, grabbing each other and pulling the other into a hug with all the energy they had left. 

"I'm so sorry," she had whispered, the crowd dissapearing from her world, where it was only one where she held Hop. "I'm so, so sorry Hop.."

"It's okay." He hushed her with a smile as hot tears poured from her eyes, holding her tight. "Don't worry, I'm fine. You're gonna kick Leon into the dirt, you hear?" He laughs. They pull away from the hug, both of them, and Hop rests his hands on Bonnie's shoulders. "You deserve this. You and your team fought so hard." 

After that, everything kind of blurred. She remembers stumbling out of the area on shaking legs, changing back into her regular clothes and meeting Hop outside, then it all blurs again- with some, important details of defeating the literal fucking dynamax god- till the fight with Leon. When she fought Leon, she learned Hop always started his battles the same way Leon did. Psyching themselves up, hitting their face. And she couldn't believe, she had to blink a few times, because there was no way in _hell_ her team just beat his Charizard. No fucking way. Her team was simple; Cinderance, Chandalure, Sylveon, Alcremie, Edlegoss and Mimikyu. There was no clear advantage there for her to win. But it just happened. All the noises and sounds had blurred and only came back when she found Leon holding up her wrist, and announcing to a crowd of hundreds: "Galar, you have your new champion!"   
  
And through that crowd all she saw was Hop, his honey eyes full of pride and hurt as he ran a hand through his hair, before continuing to shout something inaudible. That's all that kept her on her shaking feet, and to pull away from Leon, jumping and screaming in joy. 

After that was the adventure with Hop and Piers, running from gym to gym to defeat those sword and shield pricks who's names Bonnie had long forgotten. She didn't really care about remembering their names, when the whole adventure she was choked as she watched Hop struggle. He had lost the battle against the shield fucker, and she almost cried. Not because she was upset, or disappointed he had lost, but because he was so upset with himself, it made her upset. He shouldn't have been. He was a strong trainer who could hold his own, but he brought himself down. Then everything.. everything else blurred together until she had caught Zacian, and then found Hop calming Zamazenta. Then they had battled after he had caught the pokemon, and.. what almost funny irony. Two heros, battling for the sake of old times, with two ancient heros facing each other.

When he had told her he wanted to become a professor, she had pulled him into a hug so fast she almost pulled something in her shoulder. His own dream she couldn't accidentally crush. And he'd do excellent at it, and fuck, he was Sonia's assistant. She was so happy for him, and the conversation blurs until she remembers being pulled in for a kiss, one she did not pull away from. One that she savored, and never wanted to end as Butterfrees filled her stomach with a funny, warm feeling. A kiss that was laughed off, they had an unspoken pact to not talk about it.

* * *

Of course, that didn't mean Bonnie didn't remember it. She spent a lot of her free time in the heart of Slumbering Weald, where the rusted sword and shield once lay. She would let her Pokemon out of their balls and let them roam around as she just sat in thought. At some point, she found a way to climb the crumbling arch and balance on top of it. It was so..beautiful up there. Serene, and quiet. Bonnie thought about the kiss a lot. She wanted it again. But Hop and her were both very busy, after all. How could that ever work? 

Bonnie had a cape of her own, like Leon's. It was blue and fluffy, and in the center there were small graphics of her Pokemon around a pokeball. Aside from that there was various patches with small patterns, and the fluff around it was a pastel yellow. It was made for her by a fan, but she wore it almost all the time. It was nice and warm, it filled a void Hop had left. Bonnie had a lot of time to just think, or ramble nonsensically to her Pokemon on the top of the arch. She thought she was going insane, but she could start understanding what they said back to her after some time. 

"You love him, don't you?" Her Sylveon- his name was Nico- asked. Bonnie had stopped and looked down at where he sat, next to Melody, her Mimikyu.

She hesitates, before nodding. ".. I suppose that's the only way to put it." 

_"Well, it's not like you were subtle."_ Melody remarks quietly, no clear mouth moving on her body. 

Bonnie waves it off. "Shush. It's hard to.. admit."

"Melody wouldn't know the first thing about love, don't mind her!" Cream, her Alcremie, comments.

"Be nice." Liam- Cinderance- warned. Almost the father of the group, the most "mature" of them all. Ame, her Edlegoss, chose not to comment.

Nico waves them all off with his ribbons. "What are you going to do about it?" He asks, as Bonnie hops down from the crumbling arch, almost stumbling as she lands on her feet, Nico helps her keep balance as Liam stands next to her for support. She got dizzy alot, but Nico's ribbons helped her keep balance, and Liam was nearly her height, so she'd lean on his shoulder sometimes. 

"Nothing.." Bonnie sighs. The six look up at her in confusion- even Ame, who seemed uninterested. 

"Why?" Nico asks. 

"I'm the champion. He's an assistant professor. What time would we have to be together?" Bonnie poses the question as she collects her things, and holds the cape close to her heart. "Besides, I don't think.. he'd love me back." 

_"What about the kiss?"_ Melody asks. Bonnie falls silent as she picks up their pokeballs. 

"..Come on guys, we have matches soon." Bonnie says, as the Pokemon begrudgingly return to their pokeballs, a bit upset Bonnie had ignored the posed question.

* * *

Another season, another victory. Bonnie had won the match- against a girl named Apollo. She seemed sad she had lost, but honored to have fought. So with a handshake and a farewell, Bonnie watched as Apollo walked to a group of people who seemed to be her friends. She had kept the championship, and waved her region goodnight as they cheered.

"What an odd girl, that Apollo was." Ame observes when the group is all back at the heart of Slumbering Weald.

"Why challenge a league to a region you don't live in?" Nico asks. Bonnie supposed he had heard Apollo and her friends talking. Two girls and two guys, it was the obvious she was the youngest of the five. 

_"I saw Hop cheering you on."_ Melody tells Bonnie as she sits on her shoulder. Bonnie nods as the attention of the other Pokemon were caught. She saw him, too. Cheering loudly, the same way he had the day she won championship. Made her nostalgic, she guessed. Was that even the right thing? Emotions were so weird. 

"Why don't you go see him?" Cream asks.

"I don't know.. I'm tired, guys..." Bonnie trails. But clearly, it was not a suggestion as Liam takes her by the shoulders from behind and starts pushing her, and Nico using his ribbons to guide her feet as Melody sighs. "O-Okay, I don't have a choice."

So she winds up in front of the Pokemon Lab, only Nico out of his pokeball now, the rest choosing to not watch this shitstorm go down. Why was she so nervous, so afraid? She's just visiting friends. She takes a deep breath and pushes open the door, walking into the lab with Nico right next to her. 

"Hey, Bonnie! Nice to see you! Congrats on the win." Sonia greets, looking up from the bookshelf she was standing at. 

"O-Oh, hi Sonia.. thank you.." Bonnie greets nervously. Sonia raises a brow and looks her up and down, which makes her shake nervously.

"Hop's up in the loft, by the way. You can go see him, I won't be offended." She winks as she walks away, towards the door. "I have a meeting to go to, anyway. Have fun!" She waves as she leaves.

"...Traitor." Bonnie breathes as she turns to the stairwell, where speak of the devil, Hop was walking down.

"Hey, Sonia, whe- BON!" Hop basically screams as he spots his friend, nearly flying down the staircase to launch at her for a hug. Bonnie stumbles back a bit but hugs him happily. Her nerves seemed to die down, once she was finally in his arms. Warm and smelling like freshly picked berries, she wanted to stay where she was for a lifetime. "It's so nice of you to drop by! Congrats on your win!" Hop smiles, as he pulls away from the hug, leaving both of them cold. 

"Th-thank you.." Bonnie thanks him as she rubs the back of her neck. "How've things been over here?" She asks, looking up to meet his eyes. He'd grown taller.. Once upon a time, she had been taller than him by a few inches, but now he was a whole head taller, looking tired and hard at work with his jacket tied around his waist and pens clipped to the collar of his shirt. Bonnie does her best to dismiss her personal thoughts about this look. Hint: she thought it was cute. 

"Tiring, but fun!" He says, running a hand through his hair. "Come here, I'll show you what we've been working on!" Hop invites, grabbing Bonnie by the wrist and leading her up the staircase. He begins to go on, talking about dynamax vs gigantamax, and the dens in the wild area. During it all, Nico kept rubbing up between Hop's legs. Someone missed him as well, Bonnie supposed. But through all of it, Bonnie couldn't really get herself to focus on what Hop was telling her. Of course, she loved his voice and he could talk all day, but today the thought of.. the kiss, it echoed in her mind.

A lot was on her mind. Championship was tough, Leon was right. An entire region of people on your shoulders. It's your job to be charismatic and happy. Bonnie did her best to stick to that, but her hand was cramping from the autographs and the spotlights were a bit blinding at this point. It's a poor metaphor that doesn't give the entire ordeal justice, but it got the point across. With Chairman Rose in jail and still no new Chairman in place, Bonnie was a bit of a frenzy. She was so tired.. it would help to just.. get this one thing off her mind.

"Hop, can we talk?" Bonnie interrupts, right when he's about to rant about the difference between a gigantamax Alcremie and a dynamax Alcremie. 

"Hu- of course. About what?" 

Bonnie hesitates, not sure if even _she's_ ready to talk about it. "The- the.. k-kiss.." 

His face falls, to a more serious, unfamiliar tone. "Oh, yeah.." 

Bonnie giggles, trying to lighten the mood. "Forgot about it, huh?"

"N-No!" Hop stutters defensively, before reaching up to scratch the back of his neck. "I.. think about it a lot, actually."

Bonnie hesitates. "M-Me too.." She can hear Nico snickering beneath them. Asshole. 

There's a moment of awkward silence. Fuck. Shit. Goddamnit. Champion duty does not include trying to figure out if your rival-and-childhood-best-friend loves you back, and Bonnie was _not_ prepared for this bullshit. 

"Bonnie, what are we?" Hop asks, breaking the silence. 

"I-I don't know." Bonnie shrugs, avoiding eye contact. She feels Hop's hand cup her cheek, and she can't help but lean into the warm touch as he guides her to look back up into his honey glazed eyes. Silence follows, but communication is very, very clear: they love each other. Of course they do, how couldn't they? An invisible wall stood, though, one that when you tried to break it down, a sign just told her 'you can never be with him, as long as you're champion.' And oh, god, what she would give to drop her position now, just to be with him. But she can't just drop championship, she owed her region better. She didn't even think it was possible to forfeit position. Who would take it? Raihan? Leon? Bonnie shakes the thoughts from her head, her own blue eyes melting into Hop's as they seem to understand each other, even if only through the touch. Yet it doesn't stop them from leaning in to share another kiss, gentle and sweet yet all the same deep as an ocean. Their names sat on each other's lips, whispered like prayers through the kiss. Hop finds his free hand tangled in Bonnie's ever short hair, and Bonnie's own hands placed on his chest.   
  


The moment freezes time, and everything else is forgotten except for the touch of each other. Yet as their lungs run out of air, they pull away gasping, and eyes meet once more. 

Two separate 'i love you's are muttered, and that's the end of it.

Honey and water do not mix. 

* * *

  
Months later, long after the both had delved into their work to ignore the longing in their hearts, Hop finds himself waking up from a nap with a very certain Sylveon jumping on his chest. He wakes up with an 'oof' as he registers Nico is worriedly jumping on his chest. He's to a point, he doesn't question how the peculiar Pokemon got into the lab, to find him napping on a chair. Sonia seems to be out of the lab again, the only noises to be heard are whirring of computers and Nico's panic. Wait, panic? 

Hop sits up quickly, and looks down to Nico, who's now tugging on his pant leg, a way to communicate 'follow me!" with urgency. He stands quickly, grabbing a single pokeball with one of his Pokemon inside, and rushing to follow Nico. Nico leads him out the lab and hurridly dashes down Route 1, as Hop has to run to keep up with him. Then it's past their houses, which confuses Hop, and down into Slumbering Weald. He has to ask himself, what had Bonnie done? What had happened to her? 

As he runs deeper into the foggy trail, he feels the.. silence. The rookidees had stopped singing. The pokemon, generally, quiet and still, only observing as Hop chased Nico.

He finds himself in the heart of Slumbering Weald once more. He hadn't been here since the whole sword and shield incident. And he wished he hadn't, because the sight in front of him scared him.

In front of him, very clearly, was Bonnie. Slumped against the tombstone like shape in the center of everything, and her cape draped over it. Her pokemon, surrounded her with fear. Nico had only just returned, and wormed his way under Bonnie's hand, as if wanting to be pet once more. Liam was crouched opposite of Nico, where Ame also stood. Melody was on her shoulder, and Mark, her Chandalure, was hovering near Nico. 

"No. No, no no, no no..." Hop mutters, as he forces his feet to unroot from the earth and walk forward, crouching down in front of the- finally- peaceful girl. Her skin was cold, pokeballs scattered around her as if it was a mistake they opened, and the vial in her hand cracked at the bottom. But it was very, very clear that none of whatever the glass contained had leaked out. Melody hopped of Bonnie's ever so pale and cold shoulder, and nudged a note she had kept hidden under her cloak to him. He had thanked her as he unfolded it, and his eyes scanned it.

 _"Hi, Hop. I'm really sorry you had to see me like this. Being champion isn't all it's chalked up to be, haha.."_ No. This wasn't happening. _"I'm really sorry about all this, Watch my pokemon for me, will you? I'm sure they'd love you, and Zacian would be happy to see Zamazenta again. Keep doing your work, you're doing amazing. I'm sure you'll be a fine professor soon."_ The note ended there, only ink left signing Bonnie's name, surrounded by hearts. Hop looked up to see one last pokeball on the ground, one unopened. His hands shook as he tucked the note into his pocket, and grabbed it slowly, turning and releasing the pokemon inside.

It was Zacian, nicknamed Zaican by Bonnie, who struggled to pronounce the name right. The memory brings some light back to Hop's now tear stained face, hot tears pouring out of his eyes as he reached for the pokeball in his pocket, releasing Zamazenta. The two wolf like Pokemon met eyes, before observing Hop, on his knees still crying as he looked back to his lover. His rival. His friend. The two approached the girl, and her own Pokemon backed up slightly, understanding the other two. Zacian nudged Bonnie's hand, and the sight made the tears flow ever more from Hop's eyes, blurring his vision, and all he can hear is the sorrowful howl that leaves both Pokemon, mourning a lost hero. A desperate cry to the heavens to be heard, and answered by no one.   
  
Bonnie's name leaves Hop's name another time as he struggles to stand, accompanied by the Pokemon who lost their trainer, her name pouring out like a sorrowful prayer, acknowledging that things should _not_ have ended like this.

Yet as he looks around to the Pokemon that looked to his eyes for guidance, the realization seemed to hit him again. Slowly, like a bus pulling to a stop as he picks up her cape and wraps it around himself, clinging to what was left of her warmth.

A family lost a daughter.

Galar lost a champion.

Hop had lost a lover.

**Author's Note:**

> isn't it lovely, all alone?


End file.
